“The parents need to be very clear at saying. I am not giving you permission to do that. I am not telling you that it’s a good idea, I’m telling you that it’s a bad idea. And here’s why it’s a bad idea. That’s why we have rules now as your parents because we’ve learned from our own mistakes.”
– Nancy McGarrah, Ph.D., child psychologist
Every October, kids in schools around the country participate in Red Ribbon Week activities with powerful messages about the risks and results of drugs, alcohol and tobacco. Those conversations are important. Yet, research has shown repeatedly that the single most powerful way to convince kids not to use drugs is for parents to tell them: “don’t use drugs!” How many parents are delivering that message?
Blaze and his twin brother Reid have long hair and play in a rock-and-roll band. And neither has ever even experimented with drugs.
“People just automatically assume that we do drugs and drink,” says Blaze, 15.
“Our parents expect us to be ourselves and do what we think is right and know that drugs are stupid and a waste of time, and that we shouldn’t be doing them, ” says Blaze.
They’ve been hearing that message from their parents since they were very young.
“It’s pretty clear that if we’re ever caught doing drugs or anything like that then, we’re going to be punished severely,” says Reid, 15.
According to a new survey from the partnership for a drug-free America, the number of parents talking to their children about drugs has dropped 12 percent since 2005.
“You know I can’t tell you how many times parents come in and they have never, never approached the word drugs or alcohol with their kids. They just want to ignore it. If they ignore it it will just go away and their kid won’t be involved,” says Shirley Kaczmarski, Ph.D., educator.
“If a parent does assume that, there’s a good chance that the kids will do it, because it’s like saying ‘you have my permission’, basically,” says Lynn, the twin’s mother.
Experts say, if you end up talking about your own experiences with drugs when you were young, make sure your kids don’t misinterpret that to mean drug use is ok.
“The parent needs to be very clear at saying. I am not giving you permission to do that. I am not telling you that it’s a good idea, but I’m telling you that it’s a bad idea. And here’s why it’s a bad idea. That’s why we have rules now as your parents because we’ve learned from our own mistakes,” says Nancy McGarrah, Ph.D., child psychologist.
“We’ve talked about specific incidences with people that we’ve known in the past (friends that we’ve lost in the ninth-grade, you know, so and so died of drugs and things like that) there’s no good outcome to it. It’s a poor choice,” says Lynne.
That’s now the opinion of her twins.
“If you know the risks of the drugs, then you probably won’t do it. You’ll realize how stupid it is,” says Blaze.
What We Need To Know
According to a study funded by the Hazelden Foundation, teens say hearing about their parents’ experiences with drugs and alcohol would make them less likely to use the substances themselves. Parents have more influence than they think.
The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) report today demonstrating that the vast majority of youth ages 12 to 17 are receiving drug and alcohol prevention messages from sources such as TV, radio, posters and pamphlets. Furthermore, the report, a special analysis of the National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH), showed that those who have been exposed to drug prevention messages, from sources including TV, radio, posters and pamphlets, are significantly less likely to abuse drugs.
The NSDUH also reaffirms the crucial role parents play in keeping their children drug-free. While fewer youths reported hearing anti-drug messages from their parents than through media sources (58.9 percent vs. 83.6 percent), those who had talked with a parent about the dangers of drug use were less likely to report past month illicit drug use than those who had not talked with a parent (10 vs. 13 percent).
Experts at the American Academy of Pediatrics suggest these strategies for parents to stay involved and aware:
- Show interest in your teenager’s activities and friends.
- Talk openly, honestly, and respectfully with your teenager. Good communication involves talking and listening with your teenager. Your goal is to have open, respectful, and honest conversations.
- Set clear limits and expectations.
- Know what’s going on at school and after school.
- Encourage independence while teaching safety. Teach your teenager how to safely avoid violence
- Respect your child’s thoughts and opinions without judging them. Support your child’s interests and strengths, but don’t force things.
Resources
- American Academy of Pediatrics Talking to Teens and Drugs and Alcohol
- Anti-Drug Messages and Teens
- Hazelden Addiction Treatment Center
Recent Comments