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The American economy has reportedly grown 500 percent since the end of World War II. Personal income is up about 200 percent. We have more cars than legal drivers, two shopping malls for every high school. But mental health experts say one out of every eight kids is depressed.

Part of the reason, according to those experts, is that – is some families – materialism is out of control.

16-year-old Jakiya, for example, went shopping every single day last month. Her mom, Teresa, works two jobs to help pay for Jakiya’s monthly shopping sprees.

“She spent about $2,000,” says Teresa, “I’m going to say about $2,000 of my money.”

This materialistic malaise is alarming many experts.

“We’re looking at it as something of an epidemic,” says John de Graff, co-author of Affluenza.
“[It’s] sort of an obsession with stuff, never being satisfied with the things that one has, always needing the latest, newest games and gadgets and so forth.”

But, he says, the “newest and the latest” doesn’t make kids happy – in fact, just the opposite.

“Children want more and more and more because they have no alternative,” says psychiatrist Peter Whybrow. “No one is giving them the excitement of childhood. The excitement of self-exploration, that doesn’t come anymore.”

And he says that, many times, parents are to blame.

“[These] parents can’t refuse children anything,” he says. “So if the child wants something, the parent buys it – especially if they’re feeling guilty about not having spent any time with the child.”

Experts say what’s far more important than buying things is being together with your children – playing, working, talking and having fun.

“What are your kids going to remember?” asks Celcile Andrews, author of The Circle of Simplicity. “They’re going to remember the times you sat around and you laughed together.”

“Did you know that the American family now spends more time driving around in a car together than they do eating around a table?” says Dr. Whytbrow. “So childhood is being stolen by our extraordinary, demand-driven life – and parents have to struggle mightily to take it back; to take childhood back and give it back to the children.”

What We Need To Know

• Don’t try to calm an upset child by buying them things. Purchasing something only distracts a child from the issue at hand. Help your child put words to the feelings they’re having, to help them through their difficulties. (Winnetka Alliance for Early Childhood)
• When shopping with your children, teach them the importance of spending wisely and comparison-shopping. You can also use these moments to show them about how advertising works, while explaining self-restraint and the decision-making process behind your purchases. (National PTA Weekly)
• Give your child regular chores and responsibilities. It helps a child learn how to work, and stay connected to life’s realities. (Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta)
• Resist the temptation to buy more during holidays and special events. A lot of advertising is designed to convince children that more gifts will make them happier. Teach them to question claims made by advertisers. (Illinois Early Learning Project)

Resources

• Nemours Foundation Center for Children’s Health Media
• Doing Good Together
• American Academy of Pediatrics

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